The world I live in

I may not be the happiest mother right now because I believe I don't spend enough time with my children. I resent being a working mom, not a working woman. No a woman can't have it all unless she has some help. As I vented out to an ex-principal of a kindergarten school, she gave me a better perspective. One which made me realise that though I was working I still was a part of my children's lives and I wasn't as disconnected from them as I thought. The guilt and resentment is now just a quiet discontentment. Someday I will be able to look back on this period with a much better perspective. Until then happy to see my children growing up in little ways into better human beings.

Listening to Susan Boyle sing tonight. I listened to her sing 'I dreamed a dream' on a Youtube clipping a very long time ago. Apart from her throwing the judges and audience into a loop, I didn't think much beyond the phrase 'Don't judge a book by its cover'. Why I listen to her tonight is because of a session I attended at work about Creative Confidence which is about what stops us from speaking up and how to get over those barriers. The same clipping was played during the session and a brief about her life was shared. That got me curious to read about her. But more than that it was her voice I wanted to listen to again. I'm glad I downloaded her songs. Her rendition of Auld Lang Syne got me thinking of my life this year. 2016 has not been an easy year. The year began and almost ended the same way. Hospitals, doctors, tests, reports, juggling expectations from office and home and mostly from myself. Grateful to God for all that He showed me about me. I

Death stops life. Life cannot stop death. They cannot exist without the other. I suppose all one can do is make a life worthy to be remembered after death. If a life has made an impact, it will be remembered beyond death. Else both are so shallow, meaningless.