The world I live in

A student... again :)

2010-11-11T19:58:00.001+05:30

It's been quite a time since Aug 2010. A break from routine work was what I was looking for. And a break is what I did get.

Joined St. Aloysius College as a student for a short term (a year) to learn about Computer Applications. Really happy now that I did take this decision. A lot less tensed, a lot more relaxed, a lot more smiles, a lot less dark circles, a lot of time to follow what I wish to do.

Grades so far have been better than expected. :)

Thinking of taking up guitar classes next from a friend of sis.

In the meanwhile, Leah turned 2 a few days ago. The little lady is growing into a little proper lady. My mom's only woe is that she may have to keep feeding Joel till he gets married. :D

Christmas vacation may go for a toss because of the 1st sem exams. But that's ok. I'm in a Christmasy mood already and the rains haven't stopped yet. So happy me :)

Nutrition Bar for Women

2010-06-28T10:57:00.001+05:30

3 tiny bites at max rating.

Now I’m trying to get the taste of it out of my mouth. Please don’t ever try the RIchBite Nutrition Bar. Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!

Apps on Nokia E72

2010-05-28T12:50:00.000+05:30

Nokia E72 is a nice toy to fill in all those hours when I don’t know what to do with myself. Especially when the power’s gone, all the world’s asleep and I’ve woken up again for the umpteenth time. Thanks to BV telling me about a few apps. Apps downloaded till date are KJV Go Bible, Google, Fring, NGPay, ICICI Bank, Google Maps, Ovi Mail and latest one being Sports Tracker.

- KJV Go Bible is neat enough. I wish there was something like this for books in general.

- Google helps even with voice. Tested it a few times. Get a kick out of seeing the phone show a circular ring to show it’s processing my voice :)

- Fring – well! If you see me online late night on messenger, know that I’m in bed and chatting.

- NGPay – checked it out. Not had a chance to book or buy anything online using this.

- ICICI Bank – app worked great initially when I installed it. Now it’s gone to app heaven. RIP ICICI.

- Google Maps – same fate as ICICI Bank

- Ovi Mail – installed a few days before sports tracker. I know it works. Just that I’m too lazy to shift all contacts to this.

- Sports Tracker – will test it out this evening. If it is as good as what BV told me, he’s in for a treat.

My wishlist

2010-05-27T18:27:00.001+05:30

I have to write this down else I’m going to forget I ever wanted it :)

- Books – plenty of them and mostly fiction though I’m not averse to non-fiction. Seen them on Barnes and Noble and then again on Flipkart and Landmarkonthenet and so many other online stores. I think I’ll have to create a ‘Buy Books’ fund. Besides the Eragon series, Twilight seems like a probable next in line to buy. Percy Jackson or Percy something too. It’s Complicated looks like an interesting read.

- Talking about funds, travel fund has been on the list for a long time. But nothing’s come of it yet. A fund to save up and spend on a lonesome ownsome vacation once a year. A trip to Jaipur, Nepal, Himalayas, Leh, Mauritius, Australia, Miami (just for the beach), Scotland, and so many more.

- Shoes – a pair to just loaf around in, a pair for those I’ve got through sit through this boring events, a pair that’d match every outfit in my wardrobe and a pair that I’d love to slip on anytime and walk for the sheer pleasure of wearing them

- Earrings – developed a liking for them recently – from anytime wear to match-the-outfit or occasion kinds. Need a decent pair of earrings for the office. Gold earrings are strict no no’s.

- Music – I never can do without this. I guess another fund for this too. Even though I can download most of the music that I want, I’d still like to have all those singers and music I like listening to on CDs or DVDs or whichever latest fashionable way of storing

- The one thing that I don’t require a fund for :) – Lose inches. And keep those lost inches off my frame. Step 1 in that direction has begun 2 days ago. Day 3 today and I’m looking forward to that time.

Mondays!!!!

2010-05-24T09:32:00.001+05:30

Echoing Garfield when I say this ‘I HATE MONDAYS!’. Though at work everyday seems like a Monday.

The weekend has not gone off well. The AI crash at Mangalore airport on Saturday morning was a shocker. It’s difficult not to think about it. Thankful for the uninterrupted television viewing on Sunday evening. Watched ‘Twilight’. Heard about the book series. Got to buy the set for myself now. Waiting for Shrutgal too so that I can buy that and Brisingr to complete my Eragon collection. Current read is Paths of Glory by Jeffrey Archer.

A week now till school re-opens. Still haven’t got Joel’s new uniform in place. Leah still has time till next June. Heard about ABACUS which is supposed to make 0-4 year kids geniuses. I wonder how they manage to do that. Really weird. And what would Mangalore do with so many wonder kids.

Favorite Fruits this season

2010-05-19T10:51:00.001+05:30

Totapuris and green apples.

The slight drawback - I can never enjoy the whole fruit. Leah always needs a share too. :)

Changes and then some

2010-05-12T16:09:00.001+05:30

Been in a state of limbo for quite some time now. Didn’t know whether I was going or coming. Couldn’t decide about a few situations and things. I’m not sure if I’m out of it yet, but I hope there’s better days ahead. Been cleaning up my web presence on social networking sites. Those I would like to stay in touch with feature on those sites now. If I can’t, then out they go without a thought. No regrets there since I know where I’ll be able to find them if I ever need them :). Effects of this are seen at my workplace too. My communicator list has zero contacts on it. Slowly edging towards removing the extras from my workplace too. By this month end, library should have a new look (big time hope provided I don’t get lazy about it).

Joel, Leah,

Wanted to tell you 2 things today. Someday when you read this I hope it makes sense.

If ever you two wonder whether you were adopted. The answer is no :). I used to wonder about me being adopted and then I hoped I was adopted (still do sometimes lol). But no, I’m not adopted. And neither are both of you. You are very much a part of me.

The other thing I wanted to tell you is that every day you learn something new. It’s a process we all go through. And then there are days we have a reminder or have to re-learn something which we’ve either forgotten or didn’t care to pay attention to. The moment you realize you’ve had to learn or re-learn, be thankful becoz that’s one big huge blessing. How and why? I don’t have the answers to these bits. However, do know this that although it may not help you solve the issue or problem you face, you have been equipped with the mind, heart and soul to deal with life and all it throws at you. Don’t forget to thank God for this big time.

(( Love you both ))

Deep's wedding reception

2010-02-09T15:38:00.001+05:30

Got this pic today from Deep. Remembered her wedding reception in Mumbai and the reception here in Mangalore once again. Miss you Deep. Have a real good solid married life together with Lovy :)

From L to R: Veena Bhat, Anuja, Sachin, Lovy, Deep, Thanuja & Stuti, Leah and Joel with me, Nitish (at the back) and Jeethy

Leah at her first Petit Infoscion Day

2010-02-08T20:58:00.002+05:30

This year's Petit Infoscion theme was the Jungle. After thinking about umpteen things for Leah's costume, finally decided to make her look like the cute Jungle Babe. Here she is :)

Finding bliss in an ice cream cone :D

2010-02-01T11:45:00.002+05:30

Ideals icecreams are famous in Mangalore and then they became famous world over. Thanks to the Mangalorean word of mouth.

@ Work: 2 days of continuous stock checking and adding certification manuals to the library system has got me feeling like a brainless idiot. Tried keeping the local FM stations on just to get me going through the day. Hope to have some music playing when I can here.

Heard that Lourdes is charging 25k this year as donation for KG - 1. That’s quite a shocker for me since I paid 10k lesser for Joel’s admissions. Pantry discussions included fees and donations during the good old days to what it would be like for the current set and next set of kids. Talking about hikes, milk prices increased by Rs. 3 a packet. I dread what that’s going to do to all the those lovely pastries and ice creams I enjoy every other day. I don’t take milk in any other form. :(

2 days ago, I could have had a fracture while riding to work and I could have lost my eye while heating some food at home. I don’t mind staying away from the cooking. But I definitely don’t want to stop riding. The one thing that I still hope to enjoy till I can. Maybe I should take those near accidents as signs of leaving stock checks to others :)

@ Home: Amrith’s failed his driving tests twice by 2 marks each time. God bless him when he gets through and gets his license. Joel’s become very ‘chipku’ to me. Every afternoon is a heart wrenching explanation time to a tearful Joel about why I have to go to work and can’t stay at home. Leah’s not too bothered. It’s usually her time to take an afternoon nap is pretty happy to be in bed with Nanna.

Thethu has topped her class again this semester. She’s also got a scholarship from some Agnesian Old Students group situated in… um.. I don’t remember. Either way, she’s got some extra cash which I hope she puts to good use instead of blowing it on her friends. Vivek’s big box of chocolates are still sitting in the fridge upstairs. Too lazy to go up and have one every afternoon. Nice place to store them. Thethu doesn’t eat them and I’m too lazy to touch them.

Break Tiiiiiiyme

2009-12-08T16:38:00.002+05:30

@ Work:

I’ve planned my work for 3 days to just do 3 things

Complete evaluation of the test that was conducted on Nov 29^th along with posting of result to schools
Add all those attractive books and journals sitting on my desk and in the cupboards to the library system. Publish them to the junta at office
Get to up to speed with the new training and learning enabler system and stop cribbing about it being on SAP

With no pals to hang around with, I’m becoming a workaholic. Thankfully gtalk is not yet blocked on the network. A virtual social life is better than none.

@ Home:

- Thethu still has exams going on. Waiting for her to finish and then do something useful with herself. It’ll help keep her temper and tongue in check :)

- Leah’s learnt to scream that high pitched scream. I’m thankful I’m not at home when she gets into her screaming fits

- Joel finally got his school identity card. It looks real neat. Sigh! My baby boy’s looking so grown up with that tag around his neck.

@ Neither of these places:

- I wish for lots of music CDs and all those songs I used to love listening to but just don’t have the time or can’t get my hands on to. Grooveshark’s nice but then I can’t sit at the comp at home for more than 10 minutes in a week.

- I wish for meeting old friends and catching up on their lives. Miss the agnesangels. Facebook and Orkut helps but not much.

- I wish for plenty of gifts that will make me smile every time I see them. (Santa are you listening?)

- I wish for no more heart aches

- I wish for good health to every kid born and yet to be born

- I wish for … sigh! This wish list is never going to end :)

Ever noticed?

2009-12-03T18:32:00.001+05:30

It’s funny how you expect things to happen and they never do. And when you don’t expect anything, they just don’t either!

On the work front,

- D has left work spot. A is on leave and her transfer to Chennai seems definite. J will be back on Jan 11^th.

- In the meanwhile, Ap – new lady – joined this Mon. P joins next week. Lots of KT to be given. Once that’s done, dump the entire load of dept admin work on them. Will concentrate on library only. Got to figure out a way for them to give a status report by eod or eow.

- Travelling between 2 offices has come to adjustable halt. This week I travel just for tomorrow. Very happy about that. Fridays in the new office is a pretty good mood boost.

- Glad that I won’t have major loads on my head related to admin. Library is another whole load I’ll take care of from Monday.

- Life without my buddies at work seems ok since I’m very occupied from the time I step in to the time I step out. I hate to think of the time otherwise. I’m going to miss them a lot more than I ever imagined :(

Non-work front,

- Leah turned a year old on 9^th November. Celebrated her birthday with just family – Abu, Nanna, Thethu, D, A, Joel and Ibba nanna. Thankfully she had 2 teeth to show up for her first celebration. My hunt for the perfect dress for her will have to wait another year. But hey! searching for ‘The’ dress, landed up with 4 dresses for her :)

- Joel and she had a gala time with the cake. Me too. I can’t get enough of Crumbz pastries. Will try Bon Bons again before this year end.

- 2 more cakes by Nov end – 1 for mom’s birthday and 1 for mom and dad’s wedding anniversary. Joel’s a thorough Black Forest cake guy.

- Had a tiny cyst removed on the anniversary day. Everything was fine till Leah banged her knee into the operated area. Either my threshold limit for pain has increased or the local anesthetic was still effective. Dull ache now though in the area

- Shopping is fun. Wedding gift shopping is a pain. I hate gold or saree shopping but that’s what I finally landed up doing. And gold was like 3 times in a row! I’m sure Chemmanur and Alukkas hate my guts.

- U got married. I’m glad she got married in Mangalore. Glad that I could attend her reception at least. Would have loved to see the whole marriage process. Saw her photographs today. Cursing that I wasn’t there. She looked lovely. And they look the made for each other pair.

- Wish I could make to Hyd at least for A’s wedding reception. No luck there. And no luck to get her over phone twice. Decided not to disturb the 2 love birds :)

- The bee stings. Didn’t like it much. The thought and urge to squash it was pretty strong. Have decided to give it another chance.

On the crazy dream front,

- Dreamed that my parents or sis told me that the papers were filled news about my company. Why? It was asked to move out of the SEZ area. He he he.

They say

2009-12-03T09:15:00.001+05:30

Home is where the heart is. I’ve no home :(

Not happy

2009-12-02T17:51:00.001+05:30

Been thinking. I’m not sure when I began the thinking part. Just that thinking is a process that was and still is till date a major part of what I do every single day for the past few months. The thoughts came. The thoughts stayed. They shook me up. A lot.

Why? Becoz in the end, just 3 words came up real huge: Cheat, Dishonest, Liar. Am I talking about me? Yes and No.

Why Yes? Although I don’t like to be called or identified as any those 3 unpleasant words, I know that I have been that at some time or another.

Why No? How honest are you? Haven’t you cheated at least once? And no lies till date?

Some noise

2009-09-14T17:05:00.000+05:30

There’s much going on. And I’m too tied up with things at work and home to take a break and write a post. I don’t like breaks in a blog. And mine’s got plenty showing up more frequent than not.

@ Work:

- J goes on Mat leave by end of Sep. Already started taking care of few of her activities. Doesn’t help when appraisals are close and so are the certification deadlines.

- Just 2 more things to wrap up on library front. And then it’s a little bit of peace. I hope to complete them all before the coming weekend arrives.

- D is back from her leave. Worried about her more often than not. I pray that she has the strength to face each day with the same calm that she shows externally. She’s too nice a person to have suffered and gone through so much.

- SV seems to be changing a few feathers. Hope this is for the good. And not just for a rating.

- A’s feet seldom touch planet earth. Even if she is on earth, she’s more in Hyderabad or Singapore. :)

@ Home:

- Baby Leah is fast. Fast in picking up a lot of stuff when compared to her brother. She’s already walking within 10 months. And she’s a bundle of energy my parents can’t keep up with now. :(

o Leah’s managed to get stuck in difficult-to-pull-out-from spaces

o She’s protective of her bro. She scolded my dad once when he scolded Joel

o She tries to imitate my dad’s tone when he calls out to Chocky the dog

o Her current interest is climbing up the stairs and has managed to get over all the obstacles placed before her to reach there. I’m proud and worried about her.

o And she’s a constant source of amusement with her hide and seek game of holding a shawl or cloth to hide her face.

- Joel the Kindergarten Level 1 boy is all smiles when he has to go to school. The part he doesn’t like is waking up. Leah manages to get him in the mood if she’s awake before him. He’s learnt so much that my head spins when I have to read through his school diary ‘portions for the month’ section.

o He’s managed to make Leah cry as much as she makes him

o He loves to do his homework as soon as he’s home

o He still is unable to pronounce ‘R’ though the efforts are more obvious from his side now

o He prefers speaking in English at home now. My dad’s going to have a fit :)

o He is now Abu’s, mama’s and Leah’s boy. Nanna and Thethu will figure in later I guess.

o He misses his dad and Uncle V a lot. Though speaking to them and watching them on the comp tickle him to bits.

Me:

- Don’t know what to do with the bee.

- I don’t have a life of my own anymore. I’m not sorry about this. Just miss it once in a while.

- Thank God for friends and thank God for icecreams, pastries, biscuits, vegetables and bread. Amen!

It did work

2009-07-01T08:52:00.001+05:30

And I hope to be back more often than not. The joelamrit blog has ceased. What remains is this one. And this one’s going to be filled with Joel, Leah, work, non-work, personal, spiritual and don’t know what else kind of posts :)

Feels good to write freely as the thought flows. Well! in my head the thoughts don’t have many backspace or delete buttons being hit.

Cursor blinks here…

Time to get on with work. Shall post in later

I love this space :)

Test message

2009-06-30T13:32:00.000+05:30

Trying to blog after a very long time. Hope this works.

Faith rediscovered

2009-03-18T19:54:00.002+05:30

Thanks to the rating process I've now found as much as I tried to live my life without God it just ain't possible to do so. Rediscovering that I do still believe in Him.

Rating process first discussion happened this morning. It was bland since there was no answer to the question about on what count was I given the lowest rating. So discussion has been deferred to coming Monday.

Didn't go for my swimming classes today. Got a poky pain in my neck and left shoulder. I've just taken it easy and haven't done much at all. Planning to go pick up a sandwich on my way home.

Leah is full of 'ghee gees' and smiles today. Can't sulk much when she's around. And my sense of humor's coming back too. Mmmmuah Leah! :)

Leah turns over :)

2009-03-14T21:00:00.002+05:30

It's 3 days since I learnt that I've been rated as below average by my dear boss. It's a nasty shock. Would love to say more here about how I feel and what I think of the boss man. But not going to do so.

Instead I'm going to concentrate on the good that's been happening in my life. It's 10 days since I've started learning how to swim. Today's got me so exhausted that I could barely move my feet. With a little rest and Leah's entertainment, felt good enough to get dressed and come to My Favorite CyberCafe to check on mails and of course post this.

At 3:05 pm today, Leah finally was able to turn on to her tummy without anyone's help. I guess all the coaching and encouragement from Kala and Dad helped her. Now that she knows that she can turn, she keeps trying to do so whenever she's awake. No more placing her alone on beds anymore.

Water babe

2009-03-11T21:18:00.003+05:30

Well I'm not a water babe. I love the water but haven't learnt to swim till I signed up for the swimming classes last week. Since then I've learnt to bubble when under water, hold my breath and become a mushroom (weird thing to call the posture), float on water with head in water and now trying to learn to propel myself forward using my hands and feet.
Coach Vidya also is trying to get us get over our fear for deep waters by making us straight jump into 10 feet water and come up by cycling (I call it kicking because I do seem to kick more than cycle) and try to stay afloat.
Fear of water is slowly going away. I guess I'll be really happy when I've actually learnt to swim without breaks and increased stamina considerably to become an amateur swimmer. In the meantime, if I lose inches waist below and lose all those extra kgs I've accumulated over a period of 5 years, all the better.
Noticed that I sleep better now. Don't mind the tan. Got a cream to take care of the burns. And I sure hope to continue swimming for a very long time. :)

Marching on

2009-03-04T21:13:00.001+05:30

Been busy at home. It's school for Joel, groceries, provisions, bills to be paid...etc.etc on most weekdays. Rest of the time I don't know what to do with myself. Hence become a member at a local library. Came across a writer who studied in Mangalore and is nuts when it comes to writing. Reading his book 'The Revised Kama Sutra'. Check out his blog (http://richardcrasta.blogspot.com/) when possible. Have already told the library to get complete sequels of fantasy fiction books. Can you believe they have part 2 of a book and not 1 and 3 in a triology? That gets me real mad. They haven't even purchased Brisingr (3rd books Christopher Paolini's dragon story). Trying to gather my courage and finally join up swimming classes at the local pool here. Don't know where I'm going to find a swim suit that's going to fit me. Most of the time I've seen suit sizes about 10 times smaller than I am. Sheesh! I didn't know skinny was in again!

V day went on ok in Mangalore. This year heard that one couple finally got married thanks to Rama Sene. They couldnt' afford to get married so happily dipped into Rama Sene's funds. Good for them. In the meanwhile, I think I should get divorced and keep the kids and claim for maintenance or something like that. I see myself as a single mom now. It's a major change from the view I had when I was in high school which is unmarried till I meet the right guy. Learnt there is no right guy. But kids are a reality. If I do meet someone in the meanwhile when in my single mom state I think I'll tell him to stay where he is and indulge in a long distance romance. No more marriage for me. I've got better things to do besides become disillusioned with a 'family staying together' dream. :)
Leah will turn 4 months old on 9th Mar and she refuses to turn over on to her tummy. I don't blame the kid. She's as lazy as i feel right now. Joel will be playing the role of a monkey on his school day on 17th Mar. Last working day of school is 27th Mar. And the guy has 4 holidays in all coming up already. got to hunt for some vacation programs for him else I'll have to quit and stay at home to help the maid.

I don't believe in my wedding anniversaries any more. On my 1st one, I was pregnant with joel. 2nd one I was in hospital with Joel when he got circumcised. After that I don't remember. I think Amrith sent me a bunch of flowers once when I was at work or maybe that was for my birthday. that's abt all i can remember.

Got to post pics of the kids when I get a net connection at home. Right now I'm all for cyber cafes :)

Birthday

2009-02-28T12:37:00.000+05:30

Happy Birthday Joel. Glad that he liked the cake and the candle routine.

For his 5th birthday, I sure hope to make it something to look out for. All these years of low key celebrations will be pushed aside. Leah can wait her turn when she turns 5 too. Until then, it's going to be years of patience and sacrifice - read that as the kids and my patience being tested and me making a whole bunch of sacrifices.

Now to head to the store and grab a bag of chocolates to send to school on Monday. :)

Sometimes love just ain't enough

2009-02-24T20:16:00.002+05:30

It's a bit odd that I remember these lyrics (sometimes love just ain't enough) from a song right now. But I just had to get them out of my head.

Some things are meant to be. Sometimes they aren't!

Happy V day if I can say so

2009-02-14T21:09:00.000+05:30

Leah's fine. She's discovered she's got a voice she can use to attract attention and screeeeech. If she continues this today, heading to the doc. Cause i think it's colic. Joel's fine. Competes for my attention when I've got to feed Leah. And last night was hell. One screeching, the other wailing and crying for his grand dad (my dad). I'm not a great mom. I've lost my patience. I've lost my sense of humor. I've lost everything inside me that used to make me want to make others happy. I've turned into a mean, rude, wanting to be alone, b****. Just haven't reached the stage where i'll be using a lot of ugly language yet.

In a jiffy

2009-02-10T17:41:00.002+05:30

Been away for such a long time. And now when I'm finally sitting at this comp, my mind's gone blank. Starting with what comes to my mind first. Leah :)

Giving birth to Leah in Nov was a total surprise. Had prepared myself for another son. Leah was a cute little surprise. Never thought that life could be any more interesting with a baby. It is with her. She's 3 months old now and can recognise the folks around her. I realised that this morning since she kept staring at dad and didn't smile at him. Not even once. But the moment she saw me, her face lit up. Oh well! here comes another baby who's going to cling to me till she knows she can happily be on her own with confidence. Until then, lots of hand holding to do. She loves watching Joel. And got to start blogging about this baby girl once I get my net connection at home.

In the meanwhile, Amrith left to Abu Dhabi in Dec. He got just 20 days with Leah. So much for trying to live together as a family.

Moved into our flat on Jan 11th - Happy Wedding Anniversary to me. Spent the day just trying to organize my room. The mess it was that day is considerably less. Now it's just one suitcase to put away. Don't know when I'm going to get around to that.

Life is ok. And not ok. Miss having Amrith around. Since the hurried christening of Leah, I've been on my toes doing a whole lot of jobs - things that were normally shared between us are now on my shoulders. Who said growing up or being the grown up was 'it'? I'd rather be the 5 year old who still believes in Santa Claus.

That's it!

2008-10-23T20:17:00.000+05:30

I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!
I HATE HIM!

9th month has begun

2008-10-20T14:21:00.001+05:30

Finally into the last month of this pregnancy. I’m glad that this period is coming to an end. Frequency of visits to doc have increased to almost once a week.

On Sat, had an NST done. That seems normal. Doc also felt that baby’s now no more in a breech position. I’m glad.

Birthdays happening in plenty now at office. Rithesh celebrated his during last week of Sept. Below is team MER without Thanu in it.

Coming up next is VB’s birthday, then mine and then Girish. With that a whole cycle of MER birthdays get over. At home, it’s just mine and mom’s left. And of course, now this little one’s too. A few more birthdays among friends – BV, Cereen, AK, Nikhil. Will have to check orkut and facebook for the rest. Not great at remembering everyone’s birthdays.

Vivek will be in town during the last week of Oct and then again in Dec during Christmas time :).

Frictions and Decisions

2008-10-10T12:53:00.001+05:30

Looks like I’m never going to have a single sane day till delivery time. Each day there’s something new brought into my thought process. I’m just wondering what’s in store for me next. Just after wondering I don’t really want to know either.

If it’s not an attitude, then it’s a behaviour. If it’s not behaviour, it’s a job loss. If it’s not job loss, it’s a decision that may alter the rest of my life.

I don’t know what I should or should not be doing. I want out. I’ve had enough. NEED A MAGICAL HUG!

Me the Baby Elephant :D

2008-10-01T18:03:00.001+05:30

Deep caught me on camera the other day while I was enjoying my icecream cone at work.

Waiting eagerly for Nov 2008. As per last visit to Dr. Malathi, due date is now 18^th Nov. I’m optimistic that this time I won’t have a C-section :)

Rough day and night

2008-09-25T09:57:00.001+05:30

Yesterday was hell. I hope it never repeats again. Started off ok but the more I got into my day I hated it. By night I was too exhausted and drained emotionally and mentally. To add to it was a cold and cough to ensure I didn’t get much sleep either.

High points of yesterday:

A user confirming my Advanced Help Desk request with a positive and encouraging comment.
Attending Iftaar party in office with Anitha and Deepthi. Picked up 2 packets of chicken biryani for home.
Being able to complete a few tasks at work which were long pending including sorting through the books selected for library during exhibition time.

Low points of yesterday:

Pushing myself beyond limits at home and still getting to hear about ‘it’
Joel and his crankiness
Sis and her attitude
No time to get in touch with myself and unwind peacefully
Rotten stupid idiotic thoughts

Not sure how I’m going to get through today. I feel totally crushed and squeezed on the inside. Knowing Deep and anitha they’re definitely going to pester me about what’s bugging me. Don’t want to whine, crib and complain. I’ve had enough.

In the meanwhile, do dad’s stitches on the tongue qualify dad to have a black mark on the tongue?

Do I or do I not?

2008-09-24T17:03:00.001+05:30

Been thinking about whether I should give up the one I love most or not. Haven’t decided yet. Not an easy decision to make. How did I reach this stage? I’m tired of being plagued by these crazy, irritating, bugging and stupid thoughts that just jump out of nowhere and steal my peace.

On the pregnancy front, met doc last evening. She’s asked me to get my ultrasound done sooner than later i.e. by 30^th September. A physician check too ordered after Monday’s bout of 2 hours of feeling faint and out of sorts. The weather sucks. The heat’s making me feel more miserable. My back aches more often than not. I’m one kg less than what I weighed finally when I was carrying Joel. The thought of putting on any more scares me more than anything else. This baby’s definitely a boy going by the way it’s been kicking and trying to play football inside. The bright side of this visit was that the doc said I’m due on 18^th instead of 20^th Nov. Now that cheers me up immensely since I want to have this baby in this world sooner than later.

On home front, Amrith’s got a chance at a job with a reputed firm in Bangalore. He’s also giving a shot at immigration to Canada. Costs about Rs. 8 lakhs in all. Whichever happens first is the lifetime achievement winner. Udupi house is for sale for sure. I’m tired of the back and forth discussions. If all works well, hope to say goodbye to Udupi by Oct end. And hello to the flat by Nov/Dec end.

Joel’s learning a lot of rhymes and songs at school. The new book has been scribbled in. He loves getting his hands on a pen and book and then scribbling all over it. If it’s not that, then cut the book into pieces. Not sure whether we’d have to purchase book 3 before the year end. Got to hide those scissors, knives and match sticks.

Dad had a minor operation on the tip of his tongue yesterday. He’s been discharged today and he’s back to nagging BSNL about their lousy broadband service. Good old dad!

Life during the 8th month

2008-09-19T10:36:00.002+05:30

I’m so happy to find this: http://mediaconverter.org. Will work on converting all the .3gp video clippings I have of Joel and a few instances. Prob is that I don’t know where to store the converted files. Home comp needs to be upgraded. Got to reminder Narendra to send me the blessed quotes for the comp with different configurations.

Personal loan was closed during the beginning of Sept. So that’s about 2.5k saved a month. Can direct that fund into paying off home loan or making the amount grow bit faster. I’m more for the second option Got to talk to Colaco and find out what strategy to follow.

If all goes well, within a month after delivery, I guess Amrith and I will finally move into the flat. Hoping that Amrith’s final interview in Bangalore works out. If it does, then I guess life should be a little less of a financial struggle but a whole lot more juggling on the home front.

At work, although I have no issues with anyone I just feel like I should be doing more. The prob is that I have no enthu to do it. Decided that I’m going to take an extended maternity leave of a month. After that I think I’ll take up the part time work policy for a year. 5 hours for 5 days a week doesn’t sound bad even though it’s half pay. Especially since the 5 hours include a 30 minutes lunch break :).

Talking about food, hubby and a friend constantly remind me of reducing weight after delivery. I’m fine with weight loss. I don’t want to complain of aches and pains before I turn 40. For that matter even after 40 I’d rather be able to enjoy a brisk walk or quickly climbing stairs without panting and puffing. The only concern I have this time is what if this is another C baby. I hated the first C I had.

Can Nov 20^th come soon please? If the baby wants to come out sooner that’s fine with me too.

Mangalore of late

2008-09-18T09:10:00.000+05:30

Mangalore's been a place where clashes based on religion were minimum. Looks like no more. Hired goons have got a lot of political backing. Frequency of negative incidents is increasing. It's a group of goons trying to show their power and might saying they are doing it for the universal good of their fellow religion brethren.

The Oct incident a few years back started off with cow slaughter. Before that because of one guy from one religion teased a girl from another religion. This time it's conversions. The goons are claiming they did it. The folks in charge are turning a blind eye on their activities. What got me real bad was that the cops who were supposed to be protecting people damaged property and went to the extent of assaulting ladies.

I'm tired of the muck and dirt and filth. I'd like to do something constructive and get that crap out of here. Only I'm clueless.

Dreams again

2008-09-04T12:11:00.000+05:30

In a span of 4 hours (3:00 AM to 7:00 AM), I’ve had 3 weird and kind of scary dreams this morning.

Dream 1:

BV is in Mangalore. And we’re taking a local bus ride to I don’t know where. I can see the bus approaching Ladyhill stop. And I know that I’ll have to get off at that stop. I have my helmet in hand. BV will continue onward. He’s telling me about some person from Kashmir coming down to Mangalore for treatment of cancer or something serious like that which I can’t recollect correctly right now. I was wondering about 2 things:

1. Why am I holding my helmet if I’m in a bus. Vaguely remember that I think I parked my vehicle in Fr. Mullers Hospital parking lot.

2. Why should a person from Kashmir come to Mangalore when there are so many other hospitals better equipped to deal with his disease. Is he Mangalorean or something happening in Mangalore that I’m unaware of?

Dream 2:

This one has a serial killer in it.

Near the water front, a sea I think. Clean beach and sands. Not very populated. A group of girls or ladies are playing and enjoying their vacation. A guy drives up in his jeep and asks for ‘Anita’. Anita is dark haired when the rest are blonde. And she and I know that this guy is out to get her. He’s not going to harm the other ladies. Just her. The ladies help her to get on to some bike which appears out of nowhere and she’s riding away to save her life. The guy chases her in his jeep.

Scene changes to a water fall which she has to cross using the old wooden bridge. Her bike’s not going to take the weight of her and her bike. Yet she rides on with the hope that if she ever makes it to the other side, the guy can’t follow her since he can’t follow her in a jeep. When she almost reaches the end of the bridge, it breaks. She’s clinging on to the bridge and climbing up. Bike’s fallen into the river below and washed away.

How do I know the guy’s a serial killer? No idea. I just know it. And so does she. And I can see her and him clearly. I’m just hoping they can’t see me. Especially him.

Dream 3:

Serial killer of Dream 2 and a shark in this one.

Serial killer is sitting in the house of an old friend (old man) who has a very young daughter (teenager). The house is situated a little into the sea above water. Old man is sitting at a hole in his house fishing. Serial killer is relaxing on the porch above hole and chatting with old man. Serial killer notices a shark under old man’s feet. Shark gobbles up old man and serial killer does not bother warning him. Teenage daughter comes searching for her dad. She’s a blonde with her hair in plaits. She reaches the hole and notices her dad isn’t around. She looks up at serial killer and is suddenly afraid of him. Serial killer notices blood on her right shoulder. This brings about a deadly change in him,

Woke up at this juncture. For the record, I have not been watching any horror movies or reading any horrible stuff. Drinking is out of the question.

Alive

2008-07-21T13:20:00.001+05:30

Last Sat was time to see my baby again. This time’s scan showed the baby’s heart besides face, hands, feet and body.

This is how I feel right now - alive and looking forward to life. BV thank you.

6th month of pregnancy has begun

2008-07-18T17:34:00.000+05:30

Dear Baby no. 2. I hope you feel the joy I feel ever since I came to know you are in me. It’s only that circumstances around me do not make me go easy on myself at times. So if you ever feel negative vibes, it’s me who needs a wake up call. Please don’t ever think I don’t love you. I do. A lot.

Pregnancy now is something I’ve got used to. But stepping on weighing scales still scares me. I don’t want to put on 25 kgs by delivery time like I did during my first pregnancy. Currently I’m satisfied with my weight gain. Baby’s begun kicking alright. Sometimes I think it’s trying to do the ballet. Other times it’s ‘balle balle’.

Sangi will be home by next weekend. It’s a definite goodbye from her to Infy BPO. And then it’s all studies once more in good old St. Agnes College. I wonder how she’s going to face having restrictions placed on her again. The nuns there always seem to have more rules than any other place I know or hear about.

Vivek will be home too around the same time for a few days. My guess is that he’s lost a lot more hair. And weigh the same. And he and mom would have another session of ‘Why don’t you get married’ and ‘Why don’t you get off my back’.

Seeing mom and dad together in the kitchen every morning is a little odd for me. For one thing I never woke up early. Second I can’t remember them being together in the kitchen unless it was a crisis situation like a party at home.

At work, coming to office feels more like punishment. For all the crap I’ve seen and faced with a few colleagues. Thanks to Anitha and Deepthi once more, I’m on my feet again. We’ve been together fairly often. Either for lunch or treats. And level headed ladies that they are, I’m learning to keep my thoughts and sanity intact. God bless them both.

Went out for lunch with Deepthi and Suman to Gold Finch – Sanadige to try their Thali offer. Food was really good. A good stuffing and I’m glad that there aren’t any wild animals around. Else we 3 would have made wonderful meals for them.

Suman joined the department on Monday. She’ll be handling the new office activities from Monday. Although a fresher, she seems to pick up fairly well. Came to know today that her favorite color is Purple. Kind of odd to me since I just finished reading the book ‘The Color Purple’. And I’ve never come across folks who like that color.

Jeethy will be back from her leave due to chicken pox. Was a little worried when she said she wanted to join back yesterday even though she still had a few scabs falling off her tummy. Thankfully boss man intervened and asked her to join back on Monday. By then I hope she’s in good shape and health again.

Braggs’ birthday was on the 12^th. Wanted to call him and wish but I was just too tied up with work. So had to resort to wishing over gtalk.

Got to speak to AK over gtalk after a very long time. I think he’s in B’lore now. Or should be pretty soon. Love to hear him talk about his son.

BV is facing better days. Pretty soon he’ll be facing Training days for 3 whole months. My best wishes to him to survive on his ownsome lonesome for the entire period.

Have been on the myfamily site reading and not posting much. Have lots happening but just no urge or intention to write. Maybe something’s wrong with me. Maybe not. Oh well! Until the next blog post.

An accident

2008-07-02T11:27:00.000+05:30

Last evening was a time I hope never repeats ever again for me or for anyone.

I had to meet Anitha had Empire Mall. We were planning to buy a gift for Deepthi from Eden. Wanted to beat the rains as well as meet Anitha at 6:30 PM as we’d decided. So I started from office just after 6 pm.

Approaching the Urwa Stores junction, too many vehicles around. So slowed down a bit. Was getting annoyed at the pedestrians who chose that point to cross roads.

One man just ran across my path when there was a Maruti Van to my left. Was just getting over my instant annoyance when a little boy immediately followed suit. Braked but not sufficiently in time to avoid an impact with the kid. I almost flew off my seat and bumped stomach first into the handle bar section of my bike. The kid was sprawled on the road. I was worried that he was badly hurt or bruised. Was about to get off my bike.

The kid just got up, smiled and ran away.

For a few minutes, I was stunned on the road. For all the panic and worry that little incident caused, wanted to whack some sense into the boy. Riding after that was an effort. I’m glad he’s safe. And I know my baby’s safe too. But I still am annoyed at pedestrians who think they can use the spaces where speed breakers are to cross the road.

Silence broken

2008-06-30T17:07:00.001+05:30

It’s been a long break from blogs. There’ve been many things happening alright. Just that I don’t feel like blogging about them all. Here’s what I do want to remember.

Pregnancy: So far all’s well. The tiredness doesn’t seem to go away much. I’m usually nursing a cold. Transitions from one month to another have been a little more pleasant this time round thanks to Babycentre.com. Blood sugar tests done on fasting show that I don’t have diabetes. My baby’s scan report too shows that all’s well. Last visit to the doc was about 2 months from previous visit. Not good. This time got a tetanus shot, given a change in medication and advised to do the Triple Marker test. Report of this test will be available on approaching Friday. In the meanwhile, keeping my senses on full alert to feel this baby’s movement.

Work: The month of May started with a visit to vendors in Bangalore. Couldn’t visit all of them. But no regrets. I had a good time. Could spend a little time with Sangi on her birthday. And for the rest of the time was bugging BV. Thanks to him, moving around in Bangalore was comfortable, right down to the time I thought I’d miss my train. The guy was ecstatic that he’d have me around for one more day if that did happen. Ah well! That was not to be and I was back in Mangalore facing the heat and humidity after 3 days of cool Bangalore weather.

Most of May and June taught me that I shouldn’t expect much from my colleagues and boss. Reality hit pretty hard. It’s like all the masks came off and I was really shocked at their attitudes and behaviours. Thank God for Anitha and Deepthi. They were really supportive to get me thinking straight. We stuck together pretty much all of the time. We still do. Though I tend to fall off more often than not.

Home: Amrith’s had a change of jobs. From teaching in a college in Udupi to teaching in a boutique hotel named Gold Finch in Mangalore. Good move for him since he wanted to get back into operations. A couple of years here and then he can jump into something better and more rewarding financially. Joel’s doing great. Back to school and cute as ever. Acha’s well. And back to his old ways. I wish he’d keep his interfering ways for his older son and daughter-in-law. Of late getting into arguments with him more often than not. Mom, dad, Vivek are fine. Sangi’s going to be saying goodbye to her Infy BPO job by mid-July. After that it’d be back to St. Agnes and higher studies for her.The flat has had a change of residents. Goodbye to the 3 lady Infoscions. Welcome 4 male Infoscions. These guys seem like a pretty decent lot. Glad that they aren’t giving headaches like the girls did. Hope that if these have to move out, the next lot is as pleasant.

End of a funny Thur

2008-04-17T17:51:00.004+05:30

Gearing up for another rotten mood day, I was in for 2 pleasant surprises.

1. My colleagues - Anitha and Deepthi - were so concerned that I was on a diet and not taking care of myself. Their concern really touched. And no, I'm not on a diet. I'm just tired and exhausted and drained for reasons I came to know thanks to a babycentre.co.uk mailer. Mood swings and exhaustion are part of this phase of my pregnancy. I'm glad that nothing is 'wrong' with me.

2. Jeethy turned up at the library and helped me get a lot of books rearranged and shelved. A thoughtful gesture from her end also included getting me a box of salted raw mangoes and mango pickle. Yummy! :)

Weird Dreams

2008-04-17T13:42:00.003+05:30

This morning I woke up around 6:00 AM to switch off my alarm. Couldn't think of getting out of bed even though Joel was awake next to me. So stayed in bed and drifted off again. During that time I had a weird dream.

I could see my school, the teachers, students playing in the grounds, the classrooms and a lot of faces from that time. I entered each class just to see whom I could recognise. The faces were younger. So many people and most of whom I tried smiling at or tried talking to. But they looked through me or past me. I realised that I was my grown up self. So that could be a reason. But then, I couldn't see myself in that crowd.

Tried finding out the date of that particular day. The closest I got was 05-05. But one of the students said it was 5th April. The year wasn't clear.

In and out of this dream, I saw the younger versions of some of my colleagues from work. They responded to me when I spoke to them.

A few of my relatives too showed up and I was excited about showing them around. But in the end, I was never able to find myself there.

Woke up around 7:45 AM feeling very disoriented.

No sugar

2008-04-16T10:40:00.002+05:30

Dr. Malathi asked to me get some tests done. Got the results last evening. Everything's fine and normal. I'm breathing with a huge sigh of relief. Now it's just the weight thing that worries me. Though exhaustion hasn't gone away. Noticed that I'm fine from the time I wake up till around 10:00 AM. After that it's a see-saw of moods and energy levels. Both haven't been high at any point of time.

I'm prone to cry more easily now. Keep having unpredictable mood swings. 2 incidents that still shake me up:

1. The evening I thought Joel had an electric shock. Turned out to be my dad switching off the mains and the house being plunged into darkness. I was resting at that time and all I had heard was a crack and then Joel crying in the darkness. Was so relieved to know that nothing happened to him.

2. Amrith telling me he had a ear bleed. The idiot used a fork to clean out his ear wax.

Sometimes I think that everyone's out to make sure I don't rest or sleep. At the other times feel like there's some major conspiracy to make as uncomfortable as possible. And neither is definitely intentional. What the heck! this pregnancy is not as smooth as the first time. I might as well get used to it and stop being paranoid!

Time to re-learn

2008-04-02T10:06:00.002+05:30

I'm pregnant again. Came to know about it on 14th March, the day after Joel's Annual School Day. It took about that whole evening and night for the realisation to sink in.

With this realisation, came the understanding of why I was feeling exhausted by the end of a day, and why I had headaches so frequently.

First person to know this time was Sangi. Then called Amrith and told him. Broke the news to my parents next morning and later on to Vivek. Over the past few days have informed a few colleagues at work and most of my friends. Of all reactions I received when breaking the news of this pregnancy, I liked Sangi's the best.

My two worries this time are weight and sugar. Have decided that this time I'm not going to be a lazy mom. Since I'm staying with dad and mom, I'm using this opportunity to walk every night around the house. Feeling good about it. I'm going veggie again as I did with Joel. And, this time I have a whole bunch of cravings and with almost non-existant nausea.

This time I've been able to see the baby during my first visit to Dr. Malathi. Everything looks fine and normal. Or at least that's what she said. Tomorrow I visit her again and most probably be told to get some tests done.

I've forgotten what pregnancy felt like the first time. Thanks to Mom and Dr. Spock, I'm re-learning a few things. I guess I'm going to enjoy this phase a lot more than I did the first time, no matter how much I crave for raw mangoes :).

Petit Infoscion Pic!

2008-03-31T10:00:00.002+05:30

Knotty problem

2008-03-13T07:45:00.002+05:30

Long hair or short hair, never ever use Dabur's Vatika shampoo. It leaves your hair rough and your scalp starts begging for mercy when you try untangling the knots.

Switched to Sunsilk last evening. It's making my head feel good and my scalp is breathing fine.

And the day gets better

2008-03-12T15:57:00.001+05:30

Thanks to AJB and BV, 2 pals of mine who now seem a constant in my life.

You guys rock!

Not a great morning

2008-03-12T08:01:00.002+05:30

ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
ANNOYED!
Go suck on a rotting bone!

Memories of Samavesh - Part 2

2008-03-11T17:50:00.008+05:30

Venue for the band was Food Court (FC) 2. Could hear a few songs on my walk to the FC. Jitters again. I reached there in time to hear the introduction to judges as well as know the judging criteria. Attitude on stage was one of them. Now how does one do that while playing a keyboard? Oh well! I'd leave that to fellow band members. We were no. 6 in the list and each performance before ours made me think I shouldn't go up there.

YANTRA (Yet Another Night To Rock Away) performing

I was right. I messed up the first song's scale. After that, I went into this auto pilot mode and just played. It didn't sound the way I wanted it to. But hey! it's not for lack of trying to get the blessed organisers to give us a slot to practice which wasn't after midnight or trying to practice with no sound. One of the lead singers was low. And it's because me his song got messed up. How does one explain that and the fact that not a single other band member made it to the sound check that morning.

Meeting 3 people after the event and each asking me the same questions made me feel like I was responsible for the whole mess. I felt real rotten. Met Giri and his wife, Latha too. And I couldn't keep up a pleasant face. So excused myself and headed out of the campus. Thanks to Ashwin being around that Sat. We headed to the lake so that I could have my 'water therapy'. We walked the entire distance around the lake. By the end of it all, I was back to normal but still in no mood to face the music. Thought of heading to some other place when Giri called.

I owed Giri and Latha an apology. So Ashwin and I headed to Cubs, a nice little pastry corner, and met Giri and Latha there. I don't remember how long we sat there, but I remember that the conversation never stopped, neither did we stop smiling or laughing throughout.

By the time we parted ways, I felt good as new. But there was this one side of me that never wanted the night to end. So bull dozed Ashwin into promising that we go to Hookah or Purple Haze if he completed his personal work by 10 that night.

By the time I was back on campus, Samavesh's DJ night had begun. Located my team mates and joined in the dancing. The DJ was good. Though I don't understand why DJ's keep playing Hindi or regional songs only. Very few English numbers.

By the end of the DJ night, Ashwin was through with his work. And we headed off to Hookah. My first time to a disc. I wasn't sure of what to expect. Low lights and all yes. But the smell of cigarettes threw me off completely. Once inside, the place got my attention. A football match on the TV, folks sitting along the bar side and opposite, a crowd on the dance floor, pleasant temperature, and the waiters dressed as Egyptian as they could get.

Left Ashwin to handle the drinks and the food since he was a regular there. It took me a while to get used to the place and let myself flow with the music. This time a good mix of Hindi and English songs were played. Some I hadn't heard in ages too.

I guess Hookah would be the best memory of Samavesh 2008 for me.

Questions that strike you dumb sometimes

2008-03-11T12:13:00.003+05:30

What's up? - In my case, I have a roof over my head. The stock market index doesn't seem to come up beyond a certain point and what does one expect to be up? I do have a wicked thought here but no, I'm not jotting that down.

What are you wearing today? - Not sure what the intent or the point of the question is. It's usually asked by a person who hasn't met the other and uses the cell/net as a mode of communication minus the webcam. And it's usually asked by the guy, not the girl!

Memories of Samavesh 2008 - Part 1

2008-03-10T16:35:00.006+05:30

First reaction was panic when I came to know we'd be travelling by the Volvo to Mysore. No amount of pleading helped to let me take a non-Volvo bus to Mysore. Besides this inital bad start, I looked forward to playing Throwball. A week before travelling to Mysore had me practicing throwball on the courts in the evenings and getting roped into being a part of the Music band and Mad-Ads group.

Before leaving Mangalore Campus

On the bus

The journey to Mysore was as I thought it might be. The bus that was to pick us up arrived late. Slight headache due to the closed space. Threw up during the journey. Plus a road block just to make sure we were truly the last team to arrive on the Infy Mysore campus. Dinner was wasn't great. After which, went to the room and gave my roomie (Jyothsna Patro) a head start to using the amenities in the room.

11:00 PM at the Reception Block, Infosys Campus, Mysore

The Ladies of the team

Next day had me groaning because I didn't want to wake up, forget be on time for the Opening Ceremony. The only portion of the opening speech I remember is that the guy said that this event could be called the Olympics of Infosys. Met quite a few old Mangalore Infy faces who have now been posted to other DCs - Amlan, Sridhar, Ashok and met another Infy blogger from Chennai too - Viswa.

The first day had me going around the campus cheering my team in various events starting with basketball. Didn't have any of my events on the first day. End of first evening, played throwball with a few Pune, Mysore and Bbsr ladies. Then went and watched the dance programme. Awesome performances. Just that, I think 2 dances from so many teams feels like a major overdose. Don't know how the judges survived the event.

Throwball Team

Crashed out early so that I could wake up fresh and early for my first event of day 2 - throwball. First game against Pune went off pretty well. Smooth walkover. The lady from iBPO gave the audience something to watch. She covered the court and took most of everything that came her way and even those that didn't. The only thing she didn't do was a back flip, I guess. Match against Bangalore was tough. We lost. We played Mysore for third spot. Didn't win there either. :( Had to settle for fourth spot and 20 points for our scoreboard.

Right arm was hurting pretty bad by the end of it all. Thanks to Synergy's tug-of-war. Was in bad mood by the time I walked to the venue of my next event - Mad Ads.

Mad-Ads event was held in the Multiplex. Mukund was a major help. Carried the keyboards and set it up for me so that I didn't have to strain my arm. Glad to watch my team on stage. They did a neat job of advertising the "Lucky Lungi".

From there, headed back to the room after lunch and changed for the Music band.

Memories of Synergy 2008

2008-03-07T17:40:00.003+05:30

Won the throwball event. Participated almost full time on courts for basketball. Backup for the lady player for the Team A in Volley. Nice to be on winning teams for a change. Got selected for Samavesh. And that was a big surprise since I thought there were better players this time.

With the end of Synergy came the Red Devils team party. Did something really stupid. Accepted a bottoms-up challenge of drinking rum on a nearly empty stomach. Had to endure head spinning for about an hour and half. Never again. But I had fun :)

Synergy 2008 Throwball Team

2008-01-04T20:47:00.000+05:30

A goldmine :)

2007-11-12T09:17:00.000+05:30

The search for just one hymn's lyrics led me to a goldmine of Christian hymns .mp3s.

This is it. I hope this stays online forever.

More Money Talk

2007-11-05T15:13:00.001+05:30

I'm not going to start a blog. Instead, here's a link which should help most Indians at least deal with the tax part of things.

http://www.taxworry.com/

Money Talk

2007-11-05T14:15:00.000+05:30

Been thinking about starting a blog on the financial investments for the small investor. The idea doesn't seem to leave my head for a very long time. I guess helping UK get her financial plans in order has given me a taste of being a financial advisor.

Maybe I should do it. Maybe I shouldn't. Help!

Bhool Bhulaiyya

2007-11-05T11:46:00.000+05:30

Thanks to a lazy day at work last Friday, I was able to go to Adlabs and watch a movie.

2nd visit to Adlabs, 1st movie to watch. Went there with Jeethy after double and triple checking with boss that we could take 2 hours off from work. The movie began at 4 pm.

All I had heard about the movie till the day I had to watch it was its name. About 4 hours prior to watching, heard it was a remake of some South Indian film. Oh well, I don't have a high opinion of remakes in Hindi. What the heck, why lose an opportunity to have an Adlabs experience just if I think the movie's going to be lousy!

Don't ask me about the story line. I don't have much to say about that. All I can say is that Akshay Kumar and Paresh Rawal's on screen wife save the day with their comic timing. Just about 4 songs in the entire length and nothing else that I can say about the movie.

On the whole, watch it if you want to just smile and have nothing else to do.

She's left

2007-10-31T10:51:00.000+05:30

UK left with mixed emotions. I hope that all goes well with the move and life takes a better turn for her.

Glad for her but sad that once more I'm left with no one to talk to face to face.

Scattered friends, voices over distances and letters that are precious. I guess that's how it will always be for me.

I've got a roof of my own

2007-10-22T16:45:00.000+05:30

The place is all mine. Well, not entirely. A loan repayment in 25 years time, will truly make it mine :)

Rich and scared

2007-10-18T10:49:00.000+05:30

For a few minutes last evening, I was rich with about Rs. 2.5 lacs cash in hand. Felt a bit weird since I never carry so much on me. But more were the doubts:

anyone looking at me?
do I look like I'm carrying so much?
should have I have listened to mom and hubby to take someone along with me?
what if someone mugged me and then killed me?
what would happen to my family after that?
all this for nothing?

And so on.. the thoughts went scrambling over each other in my mind.

But hey! those few minutes made me grow a bit wiser. And that wisdom shall be put use if I'm in a situation like last evening again. :)

Goodbye M - The End

2007-10-17T12:15:00.001+05:30

Lots of things running through my mind and not a single word can be typed down here. All centered around M and what I'm feeling right now. The memories are just too many. The guilt even more.

I finally did send M an email this morning. 3 lines of farewell. Got a response about an hour later.

With this I hope there are no more reminders of the time we had together and of how it painfully ended. I do hope and wish that all goes well for him.

I've deleted that email just so that I don't have to remember any more. Please let this be a story ended forever. Any sequels? please let it be more pleasant than this current state of sadness and guilt.

Teeth and Nails

2007-10-16T15:32:00.000+05:30

I've taken the challenge once more to stop biting my finger nails... at least the left hand. In this respect, have bought 2 colors of nail polish.

The regular transparent one which I'm using on my finger nails. I hope no one notices the bright shiny nails. Not that there's much of the nails to see anyway.
A weird color whose name I cannot recollect. All I remember is that it belongs to the Street Wear and I use the color on my toe nails.

Had applied the coats on Sunday and the results are visible to me alone right now. Tough keeping those fingers away from my teeth. But heck.. I want to look good and feel good. Not to forget able to peel onion skins with my fingers :)

Goodbye M

2007-10-15T19:00:00.000+05:30

Today's list of eseparations brought in M's name. Seeing it felt odd. I'd kind of been expecting this. And now that it's finally here, I'd been wondering whether I should write to him or not.

He's leaves on the 26th of this month. A few more days in hand if I do feel like acting on the emotion that's been driving me nuts ever since I saw his name.

Besides entering a short note that states no dues to the library here, didn't wish him farewell or goodbye. Just signed off the clearance.

There's loads I'd like to say but nothing that seems right. Should I get in touch again or should I just let it go?

Or do I let time take over?

12 hours and beyond

2007-10-15T18:26:00.000+05:30

Was in Bharat Mall last evening with Joel and mom. Was just goofing around the place with no intention to buy anything. Just looking around. The crowd as usual was turning heavy due to the weekend + festival offers.

Stopped by the cosmetic counter at Big Bazaar for the first time ever since I've been going there. Was checking out the lip colors on sale. Street Wear was attractive with it's packaging and range of lip colors. However, my eyes spotted Maybelline and I thought 'Why not! let's try it out.'

The lady applied a shade to the my palm and said that it was guaranteed to stay on for 12 hours. And then went on to apply 3 other shades. During this time my mind was trying to decide whether I wanted a color to stay on for more than an hour.

Told the sales lady, I'd check if her guarantee was working and then come back to buy it if the shade did last.

It's almost 24 hrs since and the shade hasn't rubbed off. Not even with me trying to scrub it off.

What the heck do they put in lipsticks and lip colors these days?

It's finally happening

2007-10-12T21:09:00.000+05:30

Yesterday the papers were all submitted to Corp Bank. Now just waiting for the whole loan to be processed and the precious money to be credited to my account. Amrith got an unexpected holiday due to an ex-chief minister of Karnataka passing away. So HURRAY!

After that another 2 steps and the flat at Golden Empire is all mine.

In the meanwhile, for the past 3 days I've been working with a production unit at work on a fashion show piece. Initially I'd thought of trying the belly dancing on stage. In the end, I chickened out just because I felt I'm too huge to fit into hired costumes. Didn't want to hear a team disappointment. However, it gave me immense pleasure that my choreography based on Youtube videos proved fruitful. My students did well on stage.

The only dampener was the rain that poured. Oh well! at least this time it was a real rain dance :)

We won the third spot for the Fashion Show and here I am sitting and typing about it. Tired but very happy.

Have called up home to check on Joel. A few cupboards to lock and then I'm heading to my baby.

Back to old self?

2007-10-09T15:43:00.000+05:30

Not yet. But at least I fit into a shirt which I couldn't even button up earlier. I can wear a salwar which I couldn't wear earlier.

Have I lost weight? I don't know. The weighing scale isn't that good an indicator.
Am I getting back into shape? Feels like it :)

Not sure if having a cold today is an added bonus. Been gupling down lime juices since morning. The egg fried rice at the Food Court did help ease the nose block. :D

In the meanwhile, just one thing at work keeps my spirits low. The team I'm in doesn't seem to feel like a team anymore. I'm choosing to sit quiet and see how things work out. All this on ex-boss's wedding anniversary.

A few more people

2007-10-01T12:29:00.000+05:30

I finally got to meet a Friendorama pal - Ganesh. Not what i expected. Blame it on a pic he'd kept as his visual on google talk. He was kind enough to drop me off to office all the way from Madivala. Heck! next time I'll learn to stock up my pockets with a little more cash.

Met AK too. He's put on a bit more 'fat' since I last saw him. Limited time with friends is a curse. Next time I shall make sure I'm out on my own so that I can do justice to all the people that I'd like to meet up with.

I've said goodbye to Friendorama but not without meeting 3 people there. Ganesh, of course, is the first on the list. The others are Brad - in an events management company and Anthony - into HR and head hunting. Let's see how these relationships grow. I sure hope I have these guys as good friends for life.

The good part about Bangalore:
- I got to buy 3 pairs of chappals for Rs. 300. I'm glad. I'm wearing one pair today and they are a real treat for my feet.
- Met AK after a very long time. Hoping to see his little baby once he/she is born
- Loved walking around Commercial on my own. Never will set foot there again unless I need another 3 pairs of footwear :)

The bad part about Bangalore:
- I still don't like the water
- The place still makes me feel sick and yucky
- The place is still as artificial as ever
- Please don't let me drive around that place. I'd rather walk or let someone else do the driving.

KFC coming to town

2007-09-26T12:42:00.000+05:30

Pio Mall construction is in progress. Suniel Shetty's building one too and I don't know where that's going to come up. Reliance has purchased land near Jyothi for 26 lacs per cent and I hate to think of what's going to happen to the traffic movement in that area.

Srujan told me that KFC is coming to town. YAYAYAYAY! Not sure which Mall they'll be setting up shop. I just hope it's either in Empire or Bharath which are the current malls in full swing. I'm just hoping the new KFC doesn't compromise on standards and quality. Else I might just have to limit my KFC chicken hogging to each time I visit Bangalore.

Bangalore here I come

2007-09-26T12:30:00.000+05:30

I'm excited about being in Bangalore for 3 whole days. My plans at present include:
- working from Bangalore for a day
- meeting the book vendors the next day
- just going around and doing nothing constructive on day 3

Not sure how much of this is going to happen. But yeah! I do hope to visit a few people whom I haven't seen in a long time.

Neil's wedding is just the added bonus. My evenings are totally taken care of.

On the flip side, the documents required for buying the flat aren't totally in my hands yet. The seller is very interested in receiving his payments soon. Wish he was interested in giving those blessed documents just as quickly too. Who carries that much cash in the pocket?

Please! please! please! let all things happen in good time and favorably for Amrith and me. Would love to have a place of my own to call home.

A place called home?

2007-09-18T16:42:00.001+05:30

Amrith & I have zeroed in on one place in Mangalore. It's a flat at Urwa Stores in Golden Empire. A 2-BHK in a 1200 sq.ft area on the 3rd floor. If all goes well, we both have a place for ourselves which we can finally call our own.

The owner comes this Thur and hopefully works on getting the documents required for the sale.

Besides this the only other happening was the BEF Get-together at Pallkhi's Roof Top. Had a pretty good time there with the other BEF's units.

An initial welcome drink and we started with a game of identifying the members of various departments. Each department's members were asked to be seated together. After they completed their identification process, their papers were handed over to another department to be corrected. We (E&R) got HR's sheets and ours was given over to CCD. We ranked second in the game. We also had to speak about the department who's paper we were correcting.

For hungry souls like me the starters that were served from the moment go was a blessing.

After that came another game where we were all shuffled and grouped together based on the animal chit we had got. I was a dog and barking away to identify fellow doggies :D

Once grouped the most handsome dude was asked to represent the group. And represent he did. He was to be dressed up like a lady. My group came second once more :)

Then came the Queen of Sheeba game. The Queen asked for plastic money, longest belt, highest tower and something else which I don't remember. This time my group won :)

This was followed by music, dancing and dinner.

By the end of the evening, there were a lot of smiles, a lot of laughter, happy and content feeling and yeah, thankful surprise of being given a huge mug as a gift. Hope we get to see more such parties at least once in 6 months.

House hunting

2007-09-07T17:54:00.000+05:30

The prices of land and houses don't seem like they are going to come down at any point in the near future.

Finding a place that fits within my meagre budget seems like a dream.

Last Saturday there were quite a few places Amrith & I checked out. I loved the flat in Lalbagh - spacious, ventilated. However it was located on the 9th floor. Definite no-no on days when the lift is under maintenance and you have to travel up 9 floors with grocery bags.

Milagres Castle too looked like a nice spot. Though this time 6th floor and the balcony's overlooking the busy Hampankatta road. Definite no-no if Mangalore's placed under curfew.

Then met Sumanth, Amrith's colleague's bro-in-law. Surprised to meet a familiar face once more. Nabin's housemate during college years. He took us to a few places of Apoorva Constructions.

All in all, either the cost is too high or the location's lousy. Will we ever get to see the place we'd like to move into?

O When the Saints, Go Marching In

2007-09-04T10:41:00.000+05:30

This hymn/song matches my mood exactly. Been marching to a different beat at work since last week. My department's newsletter is ready to be rolled out.The library's getting re-arranged.

The dumped books have been shelved.
Weeding of unused books happens this week.
Old journals have already been moved to a storage cupboard allocated for my department
Got to add a whole bunch of domain related books
CDs get shifted cupboard
And fast moving books will be placed in the cupboards closer to me.

Here's what I face sometimes:

Desk phone rings
Me: Library
Caller: Hello, is it Veena?
Me: Yes. How may I assist you?
Caller: Are you at your desk?

Try keeping the laughter out of your voice while replying to this question :)

Fabindia

2007-08-29T16:40:00.000+05:30

My days are much better now. I don't feel the boiling madness within. Nor do I feel like tearing apart the world and people.

Acha though is not much better. His second operation stays cancelled till date. Though, each time he seems to be heading in the other direction, the doctor prepares all of us for the operation.

Last night, he's been passing motions too frequently. His urea levels are coming down. He's been talking non-sense to Joe. And seems forgetful.

On the bright side, the Novena to Our Lady just before her birthday will begin once more from tomorrow. This year, Joel is old enough to understand that he has to strew flowers for her. I hope to catch him on camera trying to do this.

Since at work, I've cooled down considerably, I've also begun surfing and checking out all the URL's that keep getting advertised or flaunted in my face. I'm glad to discover that my favorite store Fabindia is an online presence. And I'm going to be saving up to buy a few items out there. Check out the store. :)

Alive alright!

2007-08-26T11:43:00.000+05:30

By Friday evening, I simmered down to the extent that I could joke about my 'angry woman' face. Had decided not to do anything or talk to anyone about it. But just let it be and do what I was expected to do. Then look at my situation again and see if it still needed to 'fixed'.

I looked forward to the longish weekend (since Monday is an off for 'Thiru Onam') of doing nothing but reading, watching a little TV, talking to Acha and generally doing nothing important.

By the time Amrith, Joel and I reached home at Udupi, we were greeted with a locked door with lights on inside. Something was wrong. Very wrong.

Tried contacting Kala. Her phone was at home. Finally got through to Joe and came to know that:

Acha had been passing urine and stools without his knowledge
had turned pretty weak, with his legs buckling every time he tried to stand straight.
he'd been taken to Hi Tech hospital.

We rushed there to see him alright but something definitely seemed out of place. As usual, Acha seemed to let me know what he felt but never opened up to Joe or Kala. And there he was telling the doc that he wasn't feeling 'alright' since morning.

Amrith and Joe took him to KMC after that while Joel and I came home. The trio returned close to 12 in the night and we thought that Sat only had a routine check up in store.

Acha seemed fine on Sat morning. Amrith left for college. After his bath, took Acha to the Neuro OPD. After a longish wait, a Dr. Singh came to his bedside and instructed a scan. Getting ready to move him, we met Dr. Raja and he asked that Acha be admitted. With no other go, we did thinking it was just another routine checkup. By eod last evening, surgery had been placed on the table.

Today seems a long wait just to know how things are.

As of last night, the misery I felt related to work got a different perspective after speaking to ex-boss (G). Though I had never wanted to tell him of all people, I blurted out the entire story. I still feel I shouldn't have.

Had a weird dream that Joel arm was eaten from the inside. I could see the inside and it looked painful and ugly. Was thinking why didn't Joel scream from pain or say anything and felt nauseated from the sight. That's when I woke up. Checked that Joel was fine.

A while later, the cupboard overhead near the bed opened and a box of tools dropped down. This morning while inspecting, noticed that there's a latch and the cupboard was locked, yet this thing dropped.

I feel this is a sign of warning. An omen. Of what? About what? I have no clue.

Negative .. totally negative

2007-08-23T13:36:00.000+05:30

I'm trying to work off this negative energy that doesn't seem to be going anywhere but just staying within.

Came to know from Mom that I'd been screaming in my sleep. There seems no constructive way to let go of this anger. I can't remember being this frustrated and angry before.

Eaten up inside and can't do anything about it.

Thinking

2007-08-22T15:36:00.001+05:30

This is something I'm sure most of us never stop doing. In my case, I think too much. Or that's what most of the folks I've spoken to tell me.

Been thinking about:
- How do we (Amrith & I) manage Acha after Joe leaves
- Should I throw a party for Joel's birthday or not
- How do I tackle that ESOP loan
- How do I rearrange next to nil finances to pay the interest on that loan
- What would I do if I had the money to get out of the rut I'm in
- Can I fire my boss?
- Which is the best way to give vent to all this negative emotion within me
- Chucking the diet and just doing exactly as I please
- Changing jobs
- What am I best suited for
- .... more that can't be typed down here.

A person once likened me to a calm sea. It looks like very calm. But underneath, there's a lot of churning and bubbling and motion.

Meet a few more team mates

2007-08-21T14:40:00.000+05:30

Thanuja's snaps have long evaded my grasp. Here's the most recent one. We celebrated her birthday a few days late. Some idiot at the office switched off the fridge in which we'd stored her Mocha Birthday Cake. Come Monday and the thing stinks rotted. Had to order for the cake once more.

VSN (short for Suryanarayana V) is my new boss (since Dec 2006). Don't have much of a rapport with him currently. Not sure if I want to build one up with him either.

Ashwini was the last addition to the group. Very quiet lady most of the time.

Heavy thoughts after a snack

2007-08-16T17:32:00.001+05:30

Had gone to the food court with Usha about an hour ago. Just back and the questions that are revolving in my mind are:

Who am I?
From whom or where do I come from?
To whom or where am I going to?
Do I have a choice or not?

On my way to the food court again. It's Thanu's birthday today. And she's treating the department folks. :)

Independence Day

2007-08-16T14:59:00.000+05:30

Had been to Udupi on Tue evening. Amrith picked us up from Suratkal. Drove to the hospital and just waited near the ICU. For sure we (Joel and I) weren't going to be allowed into the unit.

Came to know of Dr. Raja who gives the medical profession a bad name. Till then had just heard that he existed. Now I knew he demanded money and then treated his patients. Way to go Mr. Neuro Surgeon. Slap those people real hard that they don't come to you again.

What does one do about such doctors?

Write about them?
Ask NDTV or CNN IBN to do a 'live scoop' on them?
Give them bad publicity?
Hold the hospital management responsible?

Heck! Becoz of his ego, one of his own hospital's employees died and the blame is now put on Dr. C who's treating Acha.

We are independent. aren't we!!

On Wed evening Amrith dropped Joel and me at Haleangadi. Met Naomi for the first time after her wedding and her sons Jonah and Noah for the first time. Also met Aunt Emy, Deepa, Navin and Evita. Good to see them. Hope to capture them on camera tomorrow when they come visiting at Urwa.

Joel enjoyed Jonah's company :)

Came to know from Joe that Acha has been brought to the ICU today.

He's through

2007-08-14T14:30:00.000+05:30

Just got word from Amrith that Acha's operation's over. Yippee!

Death is inevitable

2007-08-14T12:20:00.000+05:30

Since I'd taken an off from work on Friday, 10th August, 2007, I was able to do justice to going between Manipal and Urwa for 3 whole days.

Friday morning drove to the hospital along with dad, mom and Joel. I stayed back at the hospital till evening after sending Joel with dad & mom back to Urwa. That night reached home around 10 pm

Saturday was spent in buying rations for home in Udupi and a few hours at the hospital. With the Big Bazaar having a discount sale going on from 11th to 15th August, the Udupi joint that had recently opened up is packed from afternoon onwards. Thanks to Amrith, we managed to get a few more things for the house. Reached hom at 9 pm.

Sunday, had to pick up Ajit from the airport. His flight - Air Deccan was delayed by about an hour. We drove to Udupi and then to the hospital after he had a meal and freshened up. That night decided to stay back in Udupi since Acha's operation had been scheduled on the following day.

While driving back with Amrith, Joe and Kala, we witnessed an accident of 2 bikes colliding into each other. I'm still not clear as to how it happened. All I remember is that one guy seemed very hurt from the accident with his leg twisted at an odd angle at his knee, a trickle of blood from his mouth and a little pulsing movement by his whole body. I felt so helpless to see him and not be able to do anything to ease his pain or provide the necessary first aid treatment.

There was a doc close by who helped take the 2 critically injured guys to the hospital. Came to know this morning that the guy I saw died due to delayed medical treatment.

I know that death will come and visit me one day. Before that day arrives I'd like to finish a few things and be prepared to meet it with open arms.

1. See that Joel is well equipped and able to stand on his own feet
2. Do a course in paramedics and never feel so helpless again
3. Acknowledge that God is the only one who is the giver of life. And to Him I must return with willingness and with my 'talents' used.

Acha

2007-08-09T15:34:00.001+05:30

He's not been well for a while now. Last Monday (30th July) had to rush to Kerala with Amrith to talk him into returning home. When we reached there, we discovered that he was in no state to be talked to. He was lying down without able to speak much or move at all. Was scared that he was on his death bed.

That night he was hospitalized. By Wednesday, the doctor informed us that there's been a bleeding in his brain and that we could move him to Manipal via ambulance. He was stable enough to be shifted. And so we started back to Manipal on Wednesday night, close to 12 midnight.

Thur morning saw us in Manipal and Acha definitely feeling better. He was trying to talk his way out of getting admitted to KMC, Manipal. He gave Amrith a hard time.

In the meanwhile, I took the luggage home and had a refreshing bath. Returning back to the hospital showed how much Acha had improved. His mind was working great but not his body. So he lost a bet with me and had to agree to stay in the hospital.

Dr. Chakravarthi was the doctor attending to him. A good doc who handles Acha real well. Even Acha's all praise for him.

All of us were looking forward to Acha being released from hospital care yesterday. 'Fate' had other things in store. Acha's scheduled to have an operation by next week.

Not very happy about it. In the meanwhile, I've had a few conversations with him that have taken the blinds off my eyes. I don't think I'll be able to keep a good rapport with him. I know I should and will definitely try even though it's been a few lies that I've come to know about.

A week away from work

2007-08-07T11:27:00.000+05:30

A week away from work for totally unexpected reasons. That's what it was. I got to read a few books to kill time and journey:

1. The Seven Minutes by Irwing Wallace
2. The Marriage Market by Nisha Minhas

The week's been totally exhausting emotionally and physically. With Acha falling ill and a book exhibition at work.

Both ends things haven't worked fine. One book vendor didn't show up. Acha was not a condition fit to be spoken to. It's been a crazy time and I'm hoping that better days happen soon.

The Marriage Market by Nisha Minhas

2007-08-07T10:42:00.000+05:30

If you've read any of Nisha's books, this one too ain't much different from the rest. Till date, I've read 2 of her books:
1. Saris & Sins
2. Passions & Poppadoms.

It's always a setting between a North Indian family (Sikhs) settled abroad - England as far as the 3 books I've read.There's always a struggle between the older generation, current generation and the culture shock, culture mix - leading to confusion and sorting out.

Her writing style isn't enticing or great but yeah there's plenty of laughs. Though sometimes there's also some enlightenment about certain practices and traditions. And it's always about the current generation Indian girl facing a dilemna about what to do and how to do it right when there's plenty of wrong doing or guilt.

The books would make time-pass movies if directed well. A few did reminds me of some Bollywood movies and movies like Bend it like Beckham (I hope I spelt his name right).

In this book is a lady Jeena Gill - 27 years old, Sikh upbringing and background, working for Asian Delight as a writer of the Agony Aunt column. She's in love with Aaron (that's Ron with the Alcoholics Anonymous in the beginning) Myles who's English and teaches Japanese martial arts instructor. He's also a major Bruce Lee fan.

Jeena's parents catch Jeena having sexual intercourse with Aaron at their place and decide to send her home to India for her punishment. Jeena wriggles out the deportment by getting married to Aaron. The deal between the two is to stay married for a year. By that time Jeena's image would have been sufficiently tarnished that she'd be free to live her life on her own terms and not be bothered by the Asian mainly Indian Sikh community.What happens during that year of marriage is the main story of the book. Not going to tell you about it. Read it if you're bored and have loads of time on hand to while away.

I'm reading it

2007-07-26T14:23:00.000+05:30

Got the e-book version of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows a few days before I got the proper book copy in hand. Thanks to a colleague I can now read the book during all those odd and snatched bits of time.

I've reached the portion about Harry, Ron and Hermione reaching Hogwarts. Decided to take a break, complete some work and blog a bit too :)

Monday evening I discovered that my diet didn't let me lose any weight. I hadn't gained any either. Still weighing 79 kgs on the Dr. K's weighing scale.

Getting the book on Monday evening did help me get a good start on the final story.

Tuesday, read the book very little.

Wednesday, the day I had to undergo Cross Culture Sensitivity training. Eating food with a fork and knife has never attracted me. I discovered why. It felt as uncomfortable as it looked. Had a trip down 'GUILT' lane since I had to eat paneer, rice and a yummy chocolate pastry as a part of the training. Was able to avoid bread and butter.

This morning the library system has suddenly started working fine and sent out library reminders. I think Jeethy's hands on the machine yesterday helped.

Got to keep some certificates for Scholars ready.

At Udupi and Haleangadi

2007-07-23T10:38:00.000+05:30

Reached Udupi on Friday night. As usual Amrith had come down to Mangalore to pick Joel and me. Had a quick dinner at home and set off. Reached Udupi in good time even though the roads weren't any better and we had to stop to buy Joel a packet of biscuits.

The plan on Friday night was to have breakfast at Diana of Sat morning. But that somehow got cancelled out since most of us woke up late. After a latish breakfast, Amrith set off to college. Ajit, Julie and I didn't do much. I had a bad cold. Joel and Keziah set off playing and writing some stuff on paper.

By lunch time, Amrith was back. Ajit and Julie were packed and left by 1:00 p.m. to catch the Matsyagandha at 1.:35 pm. Came to know from Amrith later that the train was delayed by about 20 minutes.

The afternoon was spent just catching up on sleep. Woke and went to get the much needed waxing and pampering that I wanted.

Sunday morning, went for mass. And then set off for Haleangadi to Richie uncle's place. Picked up Mai, Reena, Dilisha, Errol and Eric on the way. Had a fun time there. Wimpy and Deepak uncle joined in just as we sat down for lunch. It was nice being there once more and watch the kids go nuts on their cycles and play some games which I couldn't figure out.

It was felt good talking to Richie uncle after such a long time.

After lunch dropped Wimpy at the bus stop to Moodbidri and then Dilisha and Mai at Mai's place. The puppy and the goats there got Joel pretty excited. It was fun hearing him calling out to the goats as 'Bo-ki-di'. Started back to Urwa.

After dropping Joel at home in Urwa, went to Baby Town, picked up a baby gift and set off to Brian's place. Veena looked well after the delivery. The baby girl looked tiny, cute and as fierce as Brian :)

After that short visit, a step into the cyber cafe to check on some property sites and a meal at Yo! China.

You talk too much

2007-07-20T09:24:00.000+05:30

This statement was made just as I got of the local bus with another Infoscion. It reminded me of my kindergarten days. My class teacher said I talk too much. It also was a neat comment on my progress card.

The only addition this time was: You talk too much for a librarian. :)

Things I forgot to blog about earlier

2007-07-19T17:27:00.000+05:30

I did meet Sangeeta last Saturday. She had a very busy morning and I had to take her around. The last time I saw her before moving to Udupi was after her haircut.

A further update from this morning:
The straps on the pair of shoes I keep in the office too broke too. That's 2 pairs in just one day!

Mera Joota hai Japani

2007-07-19T09:14:00.000+05:30

Alright, it's not 'Japani'. It's very much Indian made, bought during the visit to Mumbai during Dec 2006 and has been quite a relief for my feet especially when i had to walk distances.

This morning while commuting to the office by the local bus, I'm not sure what I did that the toe holder snapped. Getting down from the bus was awkward. And then I was stuck with a choice. Take a rickshaw, go home, wear a new pair and come back OR just walk into the office and wear the spare footwear I keep and hope that
1. the spare pair doesn't do something similar
2. I find a cobbler to fix the broken pair

Chose option 2. I'm so grateful that the flooring in the office is sparkling clean that I could take of my shoes once inside the building and walk barefeet to my desk.

I hope to read this some time later when I've forgotten such an incident happened and have a hearty laugh at my predicament this morning.

Goodbye Samsung. Hello Nokia. :)

2007-07-18T15:16:00.000+05:30

My Samsung E730 finally breathed its last this morning after a full power recharge. Although I did get sufficient warning signals from the phone last week, I never believed it would die on me so soon.
I've had a lovely time with this phone. Starting with a few months after Joel's birth till date, I've been using it's camera and memory slots to keep my set of memories alive in digital format. Keeping in touch via phone calls, listening music and the 200 sms's space too have been used to maximum benefit. That's not all, Joel has drooled over it and chewed it and whacked it on floor and used it as a floor scrubber on numerous occassions. And it still had the will to stay alive.

I guess this morning was the last straw when Joel used it like his toy draggy around the place with the cell charger attached to it. It just couldn't take it anymore. Sigh! I'm going to miss the phone a lot.

Since I have to stay 'in touch' and be 'available' constantly, by this afternoon I purchased the Nokia 3110.

I'd seen this phone last Saturday with Amrith. Loved this basic model which had the bare minimum I required i.e. An FM Radio, Camera, Bluetooth and MP3 player. All this for a reasonable cost of Rs. 6550. Although the internal memory is just 9 MB, I plan to upgrade by next month to 1 GB. And yes, data cable and Nokia suite is something I look forward to too :)

Oh boy! I'm excited. I hope this phone proves sturdy for a longer time than my Samsung did. Let the good times begin :)

This and that

2007-07-17T15:01:00.001+05:30

The weekend was nice and fun on the whole. It was good to see Keziah again. I'm sure Joel enjoyed having her around too. Wish I could have a few more days off and just sit at home with her. She's a sweet heart.

Ajit, Acha and Julie went to Gandhi Hospital to get the executive profile. Thanks to Acha's 'vast' knowledge, they got a few basic minimum things done. Executive profile is still unheard of in most of Udupi today save the TMA Pai and KMC hospitals.

Ajit looks well. Came to know from Amrith that his reports came out pretty clean. I'm glad.

Acha's and Julie's reports too are clear.

Back from Udupi last evening. The drive back to Mangalore was filled with a lot of insights from Amrith. As it is, the conversation between Ajit and Julie over lunch on Sunday was a little shocking for me. I expected them to have a cosy comfortable marriage. But it kind of looks otherwise. All in all, I'm beginning to dislike false pretenses. I hope I can stay the way I am with no hang-ups and pretenses and I also hope that Amrith too shares the same thoughts.

Here comes the weekend

2007-07-13T11:19:00.000+05:30

Sis has shifted to Bangalore yesterday. She'll be home tomorrow. I hope to meet her during the weekend. If not, missed opportunity.

I'm most probably staying at home in Udupi on Monday. Hope that time is sufficient to get Joel and Kezu reacquainted. With Ajit and Julie around, I hope that all's well and my temper and tongue are kept in constant check.

On the workfront, Anitha's getting a transfer to Mysore, finally! I can't figure out why, what, how of what's happened till date with her. Should enlighten my boss that he needs to be a lot more careful and prepared in his dealing with everyone. Got informal feedback from a project person that he cuts a very sorry figure. This morning one more person wasn't very happy that he was anchoring Minfy Scholars.

I'd like to defend the guy but he makes it impossible for anyone to stay happy with him.

Getting better

2007-07-11T11:01:00.000+05:30

And why wouldn't I? A visit to my doc on Monday evening showed that I had lost 4 kgs. I don't feel the loss and definitely don't look like I've lost much. But what the heck, the diet's paying off.

Another 2 weeks of sticking to the same thing before another visit. During these 2 weeks, the only additional items I can have are 1/2 an apple, 1/2 a pear, blueberries and butter fruit. Don't know what the last 2 items look like. Should stop by Niligiris and check.

Getting there

2007-07-06T09:21:00.000+05:30

Pretty close to the end of my 2 week diet. Coming Monday I visit Dr. K and find out what's in store for me next. Glad the weighing scale showed me back on my original weight of 83 kgs. It said 84 till last evening. Which means, on Dr. K's weighing I would be 82. Good.

Have been in touch with Seafarer, Copywritrix, Mumbai Call Guy and Hyd chap during this week. Glad to hear that they are doing well except for Seafarer. He lost his voice due to his treatment for the mouth ulcer (or was it cancer!). But then, in his words, the rest of him is still fine and working great.

That does bring my thoughts to the other thing which 3 of these friends share in common - an active interest and sex life. Seafarer's married with children who are on the verge of adulthood. Copywritrix, the sweet heart kind of guy, is single and too buried in his work. Mumbai Call guy, single too and I think his age and hormones don't help his control and will power much.

All's the same and usual in the rest of my world short for mom snapping at me again for somethng I found totally weird. I think it's her menopause symptoms at work again.

Time to begin my day.

The diet has begun

2007-07-02T19:00:00.000+05:30

After finding a blood sugar level higher than the accepted, and insulin levels low on fasting, the health conscious diet has begun since last Monday. Broke the rule once last evening to gobble a small Snickers bar. Couldn't resist. Had been craving for something sweet to eat.

Another insignificant day in my life

2007-01-23T11:27:00.000+05:30

It's a normal day. Loads of things to do. And I never get around to actually doing it. My work space is a mess. Not sure when I'm going to clear it up. Hope to do so before the long weekend starts.

Weddings happening in plenty. Amrith's cousin is getting married on 28th Jan. Puttur is too far away from Udupi. And I'm too lazy to travel on a Sunday just for a wedding. Hence giving the wedding a skip. Looking forward to Aunt Merlyn and her family dropping in. It'd be nice to see them again. Been a while since I've corresponded with Nimmy too.

Acha should be back by Thursday. So a little family reunion time once more.

Uncle Alex hasn't improved much. Still bent on troubling Acha. Sigh! When will he ever learn and grow up.

Bought a few more things at Fabindia. Amrith finally found the capris and bush shirt he was looking for. Bought Kala a set from there too. I hope she likes it.

Thoughts at this time in life are revolving on how to lose weight. The Jane Fonda CD's have begun to gather dust. I can't seem to kick off my sleep habits and man! I'm close to weighing 85 kgs. NOT GOOD!

Kiran had called when she was here. Her son Curt is now 7 months old. Wish I could have met up with her. Hope to do so the next time she's in town.

Disillusioned!

2007-01-18T09:51:00.000+05:30

I haven't typed in anything for so long as I had just enuff time to read and look at the pics. At work, life's been pretty hectic after the vacation.

Mumbai trip was so-so. All 3 of us had an attack of loose motions. Joel's recovering slowly. He's abt 75% back to normal self. Didn't go around much since Joel wasn't able to adjust much to place. He loved travelling in the locals out there. On the flight back, something about the air hostess's butt tickled him. He kept whacking each hostess's butt everytime they walked passed our aisle seat. The one benefit we all had was meeting all the relatives. The next trip to Mumbai can be delayed for a very long time.

Back in Mangalore, the weather has lost its chill. One fair closed. And Karavali Utsav has begun. Fabindia's come to town. 2 malls and regular events are making people in Mangalore spend. Exams coming up. College Fests and School Days happening in plenty. Rumors of bundhs and strikes keep coming and going.

At work, I'm back to handling all my tasks. Plus a few more whenever the admin's on leave. Feeling the pressure. Got disillusioned last evening about a few things and people at work. I'm feeling pretty low. Trying to get a hang of this 'perception' management. I'm pissed off, unhappy and feel like being absolutely rude and bitchy to everyone at work. But that's not going to help solve this stupid, idiotic lousy phase I'm in.

A lot of thoughts, feelings and emotions are bottled up inside me. Feel like nothing's changed and i can't kick my sleeping habits. Shucks! I still have to work on losing weight. I know that I have to do to make myself feel better and that involves waking up early. At times I want to quit work, sit at home and be the regular home person. I know in 2 days flat i'll be craving to have a job. Looking for alternatives. There are times I wish I shouldn't have got married. It'd be easier handling things alone. I've not been the wife, mother, sister, daughter I'm expected to be for the past don't remember how many months. I hate what I feel and I hate that things won't change if i go into hibernation for the next 100 years either. I've lost my perspective and I'm losing out on a lot.

After typing out all this, feel a little lighter. No I'm not looking for sympathy, words of advice or push. I just wanted to let all of this out.

Gearing up for another long day. Still got a long road to travel on.

Sep 2006: MInfy 11 and Infy 25

2006-12-13T09:04:00.000+05:30

Finally got this photograph from HR after a long wait and a few reminders. This was taken after the big bash we had for celebrating MInfy 11 and Infy 25 at the Convention Centre (T.M.A Pai) in September 2006.

That's Anshu, me, Mukesh Pancholi, Shads guy, Rahul Vaidya, Navaneeth and Pavana. Mukesh and Rahul were contestants for the first Indian Idol.

Man! it's been 3 months since I last fit into those jeans. I need to lose those extra inches I gained FAST!

A few more snaps of the Parba 2006

2006-12-04T13:42:00.000+05:30

The Rangoli at the entrance to lifts

One of the 2 exhibits

The yummy lunch

Karavali Parba 2006

2006-12-04T12:31:00.000+05:30

Devendra

Rithesh had a swell time dressed up as Devendra. He was the colorful attraction of the day. Never seen a chap so enthu as him to get painted and stuffed as he was that day. Minfy sure has got a lovely person here.

Jeethy, me and Girish

We were part of the welcome committee. Jeethy's one of the 2 people from my dept. The other is Thanu who's on maternity leave. Waiting for her to get back to work. Would love to see her daugher too :)

Usha, Sangeetha, Divya

A few more colleagues and a friend. These 3 ladies make playing throwball interesting. Breaks from work with them send me back with a refreshed mind and attitude.

A few of the people I work with

2006-11-10T15:33:00.000+05:30

Meet

Veena B
Smiling - worried - determined - J2EE lady

Rithesh Kumble:
A sweet guy - great lunch mate - the Campus Connect & .NET guy

Girish Aithal
Boss - mentor - a wiz at using Excel - overloaded!

The other 2 from my department have yet to be captured on my camera

A snapshot of my blog at work

2006-11-07T13:30:00.000+05:30